What to do when you're fearful...

I woke up this morning and read through an article from INMAN News all about the future of the offered buyers commission compensation being $0. If you haven't seen the news you can check out the article here. But before you do, we need to talk about fear.

What creates fear inside of us? And how can you NOT be fearful of changes in compensation?

As humans we love things that are familiar because familiar means safety. Familiar smells make us feel at home, routines create safe predictable patterns so we feel like we are in control, predictable behaviors in other people lead us to believe we can predict future outcomes, children following certain rules lead us to believe that will keep the kids safe, childhood homes or good friends give us comfortable feelings, etc. you get the point, right?

[Familiar = Safe] is what we as a society are really great at. We are great at making it through every day going through predictable patters and habits and feeling "good" about where life it taking you.

But then what happens during those unfamiliar, unpredictable moments that come your way.

These moments look like the wrench in your plans, the accident, the health scare, the delayed paycheck, the child who asserts their independence and doesn't follow your rules, the boyfriend who doesn't return your phone call, the friend who doesn't support you, the family member that speaks out against your plan to become a Realtor, the landscape of buyer compensation changing, the introduction of AI, the... fill in the blank....you know what I'm talking about.

And what happens then? This is where fear steps in. 

This landscape is new to you and you have not yet had the opportunity to experience these new circumstances/situations. Your initial reaction is to go to FEAR because what's in front of you is the unknown, the uncontrollable, the unpredictable. 

Familiar and safe is wonderful and it feels great. The only reason why we don't love fear is because we don't like the way it feels. 

What I hope to teach you today is how the experience of fear can be healthy and not painful.

At this moment you're probably thinking "Lisa you're crazy" fear is not fun and how can it be healthy. But please read on; you'll thank me later.

I'm going to teach you my 3 Steps to Processing Fear and then give you a real life example of how to implement the process.

Step #1 IDENTIFY Identify the fear and where it is coming from. The simple process of naming the fear you are experiencing immediately reduces your body's physical reaction and lowers your stress response.

Step #2 REFRAME Picture how you would like to feel about the thing that you are fearing. This is the step to start to move out of the fear. Ask yourself "how would I rather feel".

Step #3  ENVISION What else could be true? You need to envision what else could be true instead of fixating on the fearful story your brain has created. Your brain has created this story to help explain the way you are feeling. It's time you took control of your emotions and intentionally created a thought that creates a better feeling for you (not fear).

Let's put this into action. Here's a real life example.

Realtor: "I am freaking out about the NAR commission change"

Step #1 IDENTIFY I fear that we won't get paid for buyers, only sellers. Who's going to pay us on top of everything else we have to pay? I don't think people will understand the value we bring enough to pay us.

Step #2 REFRAME I'd like to feel secure in my job and future compensation.

Step #3 ENVISION It could be true that I can figure it out. It could also be true that industries change and I'm confident I can adjust and succeed. I will continue to move forward, just in a different way. It could also be true that I'm amazing at my job and future clients will want my help, and we will figure it out. It will be different but that doesn't mean it will be bad or wrong, it could be even more amazing than it is now.

Now that you know where fear comes from and why it shows up you can move through it! Amazing, isn't it. 

This is the mindset work of champions. 

If you have a question I'd love to hear from you at Ask A Coach this Thursday.~ here's your chance to get coached for free!

Life is meant to be experienced. Let's make that experience more enjoyable.

Wishing you all the best this week.
 Coach Lisa Binggeli


Right now you can listen and learn from others' experiences on the latest podcast episodes of Real Estate Business Growth & Mindset Coaching with a new episode where I coached agents on the following topics:
Where do I double down to get more leads? 
What if my family doesn't support my career choice? 
and more!

Listen on Apple Podcasts HERE
Listen on Spotify HERE
Listen on Google HERE

What's next?

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